This isn't a joke I really think there needs to be an artifact called "the kitchen sink".
It can only be used after you using 5 or more other artifacts on a ship.
As for what it dos I don't care.

maybe a last ditch attack that leaves your ship disabled, doing , say 5x attack in one blow

I like it.

we already have something like that. the tactical bypass for 5 blue badges can put the hurt on even the largest ships in the game

This is far different.
1)You don't have to hack.
2)It's 1 big attack. That disables you.
3)It's got an awesome name.